Five Years

Over the past 5 years, I have searched for my Miracle Doctor, MD. The person who would be able to provide a solution. The person who understands the pain I endure. The person who would see me as an unfinished work of art.

At the beginning of my search, I didn't have health insurance. I had a dentist who I went to for a root canal. He suggested I see a local Maxillofacial Surgeon, Dr. Gagnon. My mother paid for my office visit with Dr. Gagnon. He was very nice from the first moment we met. Very sympathetic to my situation and understood the urgency to have my mouth repaired. Knowing that I did not have health insurance, Dr. Gagnon offered his services of pulling my teeth free of charge. What Doctors do that these days?

I felt a big sensation of relief after that first visit with him. Finally, I was going to have my mouth fixed and look like a normal woman. Dr. Gagnon said, find someone who will make a partial, or denture, and I will take care of removing any or all of your teeth. Wow!

It was a very slow start on my journey to find my Miracle Doctor. While waiting for Doctors to return my calls, two teeth became badly infected. I called Dr. Gagnon. He pulled them both, keeping his word, at no charge. Of course while I was there, he pushed me to find my Miracle Doctor.

I started making appointments with regular dentists, orthodontists, specialists. During the first two years, I couldn't even get a dentist to do a filling, let alone a denture or implants. They were all afraid of the complexity of my mouth, they wouldn't touch me. Some said it was pointless, the teeth just need to all come out.

By the end of the 2nd year, I was desperate. I had also become engaged. I wanted so badly to have a Smile to show off in my wedding photos. To this day, I have no pictures of myself with my mouth open. It's embarrassing, it's shameful, and quite frankly it's disgusting to see.

I truly believe I have missed out on great job opportunities because of my mouth. With my speech, people tend to focus on my mouth when I talk. Employers don't want someone with a speech problems and a bad looking mouth, to represent or speak for their company.

I was having the worst time in my entire life finding employment. I was planning a wedding in which I, like most brides, would be the focus of in pictures. I was urgently trying to find someone that could save me, and my big day. As I sat at home, I was watching Oprah one day. It would become of one her most famous shows, as she gave everyone in the audience a brand new car.

I thought to myself, if she can do that, can she help save my mouth? So I jumped on the computer and emailed my story to her. I wasn't asking her to pay the bill to get my mouth completely fixed. I was simply hoping she would love to know more, possibly help me find a sponsor and doctor, and then show my transformation from start to finish. She's a humanitarian, she's a daytime talk show host, and I felt my situation was the perfect the way for her to help and benefit her show with a touching story and a happy ending.

My email went unanswered. My wedding day came and went. All the pictures from that special day are beautiful photos, with my mouth closed. Every time I look at them, all I see is a reminder of bad, painful teeth that prohibit me from Smiling. It took my husband two years to convince me to have our wedding photos printed and framed. He's proud of them, but I don't enjoy them like I should.

Soon after we were married, I was able to get on his health insurance. I also finally landed a job. Not the job I really wanted, but a job I really needed. I'm not seen by clients or customers, I don't have to speak to anyone, there's no telephone to answer, I just sit alone and do my work with my mouth shut. Two and a half years later, I'm still in the same job, which I love because I don't have to face anyone publicly or try to make people understand me on the phone.

Before I was finally insured, yet another dentist had referred me to a Prothodontist. He's the only one we have in my city. (For several reasons, I will only refer to him as DJ.)Mom and I went to see him and I was very excited and hopeful. That is until I stepped into his office. Hi-tech toys everywhere. He had the full leather dental chairs, a computer next to each dental chair, a very large Flat LCD TV in the waiting room, and of course one hooked to the dental chair in each room. As we were waiting, his employees were talking about the trip that the entire office was going to be taking to Las Vegas.

When DJ walked into the room for my visit, I felt tension immediately. I can't explain what it was, but I did not feel comfortable. We explained my current state, explained that I was in pain, explained what I was hoping to accomplish. He took one look in my mouth and commented on how poorly my palate had been built. (What? No other doctor had ever said such a thing?!) He said there was a risk that pulling my top teeth could cause my palate to collapse. He stated that the top fixture would be the easy part, but the bottoms would be the real challenge. (What? My top has a hole, my top has jaw bone missing, my top has a surgically placed palate! My bottom was normal!)

DJ said, get all your teeth removed except the bottom two eye teeth. I can make a top denture with an opturator to seal your hole. DJ could also make a bottom denture, but he said my gums are too shallow and it probably won't stay in place. Not a problem though, because he said we could always insert tiny implant snaps if we needed.

DJ wanted to know what kind of insurance I had. Well I had none at that time. He chuckled at me and informed me that this would not be a cheap process. I was not laughing. He estimated that the total cost would be between $20,000 and $24,000. I certainly don't have that kind of money. I asked about payment plans, but that was not an option for his services. In fact, he was requesting $8,000 cash up front to even begin any work. He referred us to CareCredit for the balance. I would not qualify. My mom applied for it and was accepted, however the interest rate was incredibly high. Not only that, but she was retiring by the end of the year.

I just couldn't let my mother put that much on a high interest bearing account near her retirement. My hope was shattered, but it didn't end there. The past 3 years coming to a blog near you.